The moment I saw this sparkly little skirt on Express.com, I was drawn to it like a moth to a flame; like Elizabeth Taylor to another marriage; like a real housewife of Beverly Hills to Botox. I really, really wanted it.
A 40% off coupon code sealed the deal and before you could say “ERRRMAHHGAWWD SEQUINS!!!”, this sassy little number was ordered and on its way to Seattle. In the midst of my sparkle coma, I failed to pay attention to the important details like, oh, fabric type and size. “Medium? That sounds great!!!” I said to myself as I enthusiastically hit the ‘Add to Cart’ button, and it was pretty great, for about 7 days.
I continued on in my happy, somewhat oblivious state of sequined mini-skirt bliss right up until a week later when I opened the box. That’s when I remembered what the generic sizes of “Small,” “Medium,” and “Large” REALLY mean when it comes to skirts.
Stretchy, clingy, “saran-wrap” fabric. Somehow always accompanied by an elastic waistband and designed to look spectacular on those with 12% body fat and/or Julia Robert’s 44″ legs (*cough*cough* not me *cough*cough).
Oh God, what had I done?!
I had always been keen on avoiding these types of skirts like the plague, opting instead for skirts with a stiffer fabric and structure that worked WITH me to hide the huge sandwich I ate for lunch, not AGAINST me. And yet here I was, at the crossroads between “Ooooooooohhhhh shinyyyy. ME WANT!” and “If I keep this skirt, I realistically can never eat carbohydrates again.”
But, internal dialogue aside, I figured I should at least try it on given that it had the decency to travel all the way from Groveport, Ohio in an attempt to find a welcoming home in my closet. And who I am to be rude and unwelcoming after all that effort?
I had already mentally prepared myself to put this beauty back in the shipping box and sooth my sequin craving with something completely lovely and impractical like this, so I was more than pleasantly surprised when I didn’t immediately hate it. In fact, I kinda liked it. And then, I kinda loved it. Spoiler alert – the skirt never made it back to Ohio.
Moral of the story – don’t be afraid to try a new style outside of your comfort zone every now and then. Especially one that involves sequins…
Express Sequined Embellished Mini Skirt found here
Gap Navy Embellished Sweater purchased on final sale (no longer available online), similar found here
H&M Gold short necklace found here
H&M Black Wedge Booties (old), similar found here